


Everlasting

by butterflyslinky



Category: That Guy with the Glasses/Channel Awesome
Genre: Alternate Universe, I'm Sorry, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-26
Updated: 2016-03-26
Packaged: 2018-05-29 05:54:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 11,365
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6362074
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/butterflyslinky/pseuds/butterflyslinky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A horrifying event. The pain that comes after. The mystery of why. And the healing power of forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Losing Trust

**Author's Note:**

> I am not proud of this story. It's awful and I am sorry for writing it. It's being reposted here for bookkeeping purposes.

Linkara’s eyes opened with a start. He didn’t know what was going on, and while he often woke up in strange places, he could usually remember how he got there.  
  


He was lying face down on a bed, and not a very comfortable one. His head hurt terribly. Linkara turned his head, trying to determine where he was, but the room was pitch black.  
  


That was when Linkara realized that his wrists were handcuffed to the bedposts and that he was naked. Linkara almost panicked then, but quickly regained his composure.  
  


“Okay, Spoony,” he called, ignoring the pain in his head. “You win. Let me go now.”  
  


There was no answer. Linkara frowned. “Spoony?” He heard a faint, rapid breathing close by, though he couldn’t see anyone. “Seriously, I am not in the mood for this tonight. Get off on something else.”  
  


The breathing grew louder. Linkara strained his eyes, exacerbating his headache, and then he saw them. Those spirals that had haunted his dreams for so many years.  
  


That was when Linkara began to struggle, ignoring the pain in his head and the hard bite of the handcuffs. Linkara’s mind was numb with fear, unable to imagine how this had happened. Bound, naked, alone in the dark, voice paralyzed with fear, Linkara was entirely at the mercy of the villain before him.  
  


Insano stood beside the bed, staring down at his captive, his expression unreadable under the goggles. Linkara struggled harder, twisting his hands and straining his wrists, desperate to escape. Insano slapped him, shocking him into stillness. Linkara could do nothing as Insano touched him, could only reflect on the difference between this and the touch he was accustomed to.  
  


Linkara had started dating Spoony a few months before. At first it had been simple, a post-battle “glad-we’re-not-dead” fuck, but it soon turned into something more, a love that was beyond reason or comprehension, built on something that no one seemed to understand.  
  


The only thing that they never addressed was Insano. Despite the amount of trust that existed between them, neither one of them wanted to bring it up. They had something wonderful, and neither wanted to lose it by referring to the mad doppelganger in the basement.  
  


Linkara was regretting that now as Insano’s hands, so like Spoony’s and yet completely different, ran over his back, down his legs and between them, touching him in ways Linkara would never permit and certainly didn’t like. At least, not this way, without the chance to say no or fight back. Insano’s touch was rough and unyielding, much like Spoony’s at times, but without the question that was always present, the uncertainty that was both irritating and exciting, the gentle hesitation in his eyes whenever they made love. Spoony always tried to be kind in his touch, in spite of his angry nature and hands roughened by the calluses born from years of gaming. Linkara loved those hands, that touch. The contrast of the rough hands and soft touch never failed to excite him.  
  


There was none of that now. Insano’s hands were the same size and shape as Spoony’s, but where there should have been calluses and hard skin, Insano had scars and dryness, the blunt nails Linkara was accustomed to replaced by longer, almost claw-like nails. Insano was not gentle, not hesitant at all in taking every inch of Linkara’s body. And Linkara could do nothing, his sense of violation growing with every passing moment.  
  


Insano stopped suddenly. Stepped back and eyed Linkara for a moment.  
  


Linkara looked back at his enemy and found his voice. “Why?” he asked, unable to think of anything else.  
  


Insano glared. “You’ve hurt me. You’ve destroyed me, over and over again, and yet you take a lover who is an exact copy. Why wouldn’t I hurt you?”  
  


“Spoony…”  
  


Insano slapped him again, harder this time, and Linkara could feel his cheek bruising. “You know it’s true. You know we’re the same. You created us, after all.” Insano reached up and removed his goggles. Linkara flinched as the pale green eyes he knew and loved so well stared down at him. They were Spoony’s eyes, but there was so much loathing, so much cruelty in them that if it had been anyone more than Insano, Linkara would have been even more frightened. Was that what had been hiding behind the goggles all this time? Had that hatred always been there, lurking behind the scientist’s comedic, incompetent demeanor?  
  


“Don’t struggle,” Insano ordered. “That will only make it worse.”  
  


And then he was on top of Linkara, his nails scratching hard down Linkara’s back, his mouth going to Linkara’s neck, teeth sinking into Linkara’s skin as Insano roughly forced himself into him. Linkara screamed and twisted harder, struggling against the crushing weight and terrible invasion to no avail. Insano’s teeth bit harder, drawing blood, and his hands settled on Linkara’s hips, his nails digging in deep. Linkara began to sob. This was too much. Not just the pain—Linkara could handle pain—but the fact that it was Insano, that the image of his lover was being used against him…  
  


Insano was whispering in his ear now. “Do you still trust him? Will you still love him after this?”  
  


Linkara whimpered, choking as Insano thrust harder, making him feel as though his entire body was being torn apart. He felt his skin break under Insano’s nails and begin to bleed, which only caused Insano to dig in deeper. Linkara’s neck still bled as well, the hot liquid running sickeningly down the side of his neck.  
  


“After I’m done, your love will be gone. You won’t be able to love this body… and he won’t be able to forgive you for being with another.”  
  


“No,” Linkara choked. “Please…”  
  


“It’s so easy to break you,” Insano hissed. “So easy to tear down what took so long to build… but it was never really there…”  
  


Linkara squeezed his eyes shut. All he saw was Spoony, his smile, his hands, his eyes… and Linkara sobbed harder, knowing that the image on his head, the image of his lover, was also the image of the man who was hurting him in ways that Linkara had never imagined.  
  


“And you will know how cruel we both can be.”  
  


Linkara screamed again, screamed because he knew it was true. Spoony tried to be kind, repressed his natural roughness to please Linkara, but there were times when Spoony would be overcome with passion, when a sharp cry or a tap on the shoulder would have Spoony apologizing for hours, times when Linkara would find bruises on his arms, scratches on his chest, marks on his neck, but they were never intentional, never inflicted out of cruelty. Spoony was rough, but never unkind.  
  


Insano’s thrusts grew faster. His mouth returned to Linkara’s neck, deepening the cut, his nails digging deeper, the blood trickling down between his fingers. Tears ran down Linkara’s face, his sobs echoing in the dark room, but with no one to save him…  
  


A light clicked on, there was a rough shout, and Insano’s weight was suddenly gone. Linkara’s eyes opened, the sudden brightness blinding him and reminding him of the pain in his head. He heard Spoony before he saw him, shouting curses and filling the air with the sound of pounded flesh. Sure enough, once his eyes had adjusted, Linkara saw that Spoony had Insano pinned by his throat against the wall and was hitting him much harder than Linkara thought possible. The fury on his face was terrifying and Linkara realized that Spoony fully intended to kill his doppelganger.  
  


Linkara was not strictly opposed to this idea, but it would raise a lot of awkward questions if anyone ever found out. He found his voice. “Spoony,” he said weakly. “Help me.”  
  


Spoony paused mid-blow and turned to look at Linkara, his eyes full of murderous rage, his grip on Insano’s throat tightening. “Where are the keys?” he asked his double, his voice low and threatening.

“I…”  
  


Spoony shook him roughly. “Where are the fucking keys?"  
  


Insano pointed to a previously ignored desk in the corner. Spoony punched him in the head one more time and threw him to the ground. He strode over to the desk and rifled through the drawers for a moment. Then he was at Linkara’s side, unlocking the handcuffs. Linkara’s arms fell and that was when everything—the pain, the shock, the violation, the shame that Spoony had seen him so weak and broken and utterly helpless—overwhelmed him and Linkara blacked out.

***

Spoony didn’t know what to do. His last punch had rendered Insano unconscious and now he was left with two injured men and no clue as to what he should do with them. Well, what to do with Linkara, anyway. Insano could die for all he cared. But Linkara…  
  


There was still blood running down Linkara’s neck and legs, staining the sheets. Spoony had given no thought to Linkara when he had pulled Insano off of him, but ending it like that probably did a bit of additional injury. Of course, so much damage had already been done that it probably didn’t make much difference.  
  


Spoony looked at his lover, feeling a great sense of loss and guilt and rage. He had always thought of Linkara as strong, in spite of his gentleness with Spoony and his pale skin that bruised so easily. He had never given a thought to Linkara’s safety, had always assumed that that Linkara could handle anything the world could throw at him. Clearly, Spoony should have done more, should have protected his lover, should have kept a closer eye on Insano, should have prevented this somehow. Now Linkara had been hurt worse than he ever had been before and it was all Spoony’s fault.  
  


Spoony shook himself. Blaming himself wasn’t going to help Linkara. There would be time for self-pity later. He examined Linkara more closely. The nail-marks in his hips, while much deeper than anything Spoony could ever inflict, were probably not the most pressing injuries. The bruises on his cheeks were darkening quickly and would hurt like hell when Linkara woke up, but there wasn’t much Spoony could do about it. The scratches on his back ran deep and would probably scar, along with the cuts on his hips and neck. The mark on his neck was the most worrisome, except for the wounds that Spoony didn’t want to think about, a deep, bloody mark that would always be there, always be a reminder of what had happened here.  
  


Spoony knew that those injuries needed to be treated, though there was nothing in the lab that could be used for first aid, not that he trusted, anyway, and Spoony did not want to leave Linkara alone with Insano, unconscious or not, but he couldn’t move Linkara easily—trying to move someone who was a lot heavier than he was up stairs was probably a bad idea for both of them.  
  


Leaving for a moment was the safest option, once a few precautions had been taken. Spoony took the handcuffs from the bed and clasped them around Insano’s wrists, dragging him to the desk and binding him to it. Only when the scientist was secured did Spoony run back up the stairs, through the door to the lab, and into his own bathroom. He dug through the medicine cabinet until he found peroxide, cotton balls, and gauze. He ran back downstairs; Linkara and Insano were still unconscious.  
  


Spoony knelt beside Linkara, pouring peroxide onto the cotton with trembling hands and gently running it over the cut on Linkara’s neck. Linkara moaned and his eyes opened. He flinched back and curled in on himself, whether from the sting of the peroxide or the memory of what had just happened, Spoony wasn’t sure.  
  


“Shh,” Spoony whispered gently. “It’s okay. It’s just me.”

Linkara only stared at him with wide, fearful eyes, and that was when it clicked. Insano had not been wearing his goggles when Spoony had burst in. It was Spoony’s face that had looked at Linkara with such cruelty, Spoony’s eyes that had met his, Spoony’s form that had so utterly broken him. Of course he was afraid. How could Linkara be sure that it really was Spoony tending him? It would take a lot more trust than Linkara had to accept that Spoony was his lover, his protector, someone who wanted to care for him.  
  


“I know it’s hard,” Spoony said softly. “But it’s really me. Please, let me help.”  
  


Linkara didn’t move, but when Spoony touched the peroxide to his skin again, Linkara didn’t flinch. Spoony cleaned the cut on his neck and the ones on his hips as gently as he could. Linkara whimpered a few times but otherwise lay still. But when Spoony reached for the gauze, Linkara shook his head. “I want a shower,” he murmured.  
  


Spoony nodded in understanding. “Can you stand up?”  
  


Linkara nodded and pushed himself to his feet. Spoony flinched at how shaky Linkara was, and at the amount of blood still running down his legs. Spoony held out his hand, but Linkara ignored it, making his way unsteadily across the room. Spoony stayed with him, resisting the urge to place his hand on Linkara’s arm, knowing that he didn’t want to be touched. He led Linkara up the stairs and to the bathroom, leaving when the door closed to go find Linkara’s clothes.

***

Linkara ran the water as hot as possible and scrubbed himself as hard as he could, but it wasn’t enough. He could still feel those hands on his back, the mouth at his neck, the utter revulsion flowing through him. Every inch of his body ached from the attack, and would he ever stop bleeding? Even when the blood had stopped flowing he swore it was still there, running down his skin no matter how hard he tried to wash it away.  
  


He scrubbed for an hour, burning his skin under the scalding water, but at the end of it he still didn’t feel clean. His skin was raw and he had stopped bleeding, and he was internally grateful that he stayed at Spoony’s often enough to have a towel already there for him. He wrapped himself in it and sat on the edge of the tub, staring at the floor, trying not to think of anything, though his mind kept replaying the event. Unbidden, the tears began again, flowing silently down his face, and it was all he could do not to be sick. But he forced himself to keep his stomach down, needing to be in control. Needing to convince himself he was still strong.  
  


There was a knock on the door. Linkara knew it was Spoony. He had heard that knock a hundred times, a quick tap that was more to announce his presence than ask permission, but this time Spoony waited for Linkara to open the door before entering and holding out the neat stack of clothes. Linkara took them silently and dressed quickly, grateful for the familiar feel of his clothes, even if he had trouble with the buttons on the plaid. Spoony waited silently until he was finished, and then pulled out the gauze and bandaged the wound on his neck.  
  


“I can teleport you home,” Spoony said when he was done.  
  


Linkara nodded. He felt that he should say something, but he wasn’t sure what. He didn’t look at Spoony as the teleporter lit up and sent him back to Minnesota.  
  


Spoony went with him. When they arrived in Linkara’s living room, they were immediately greeted by a very distressed-looking Harvey Finevoice. “Kid!” he cried when he saw the bruised cheek and marked neck. “What--?”  
  


Linkara shook his head, the shame of what had happened too much for him. He pushed past Harvey and went back to his room, Spoony close behind him. Once there, Linkara collapsed on the bed, not even bothering to remove his hat or glasses. He instantly curled in on himself, turning his back to Spoony.  
  


“Linkara?” Spoony said hesitantly. Linkara didn’t answer, just stared at the wall with eyes that were starting to tear up again.  
  


“Can I do anything?”  
  


Linkara shook his head jerkily.  
  


“Should I tell the others?”  
  


Linkara hesitated, then nodded. They’d find out soon enough. Better that Spoony tell them the facts so they could just leave him alone.  
  


He heard the door close as Spoony left, most likely to inform his crew how incompetent he was. What sort of hero was he, that Dr. Insano could take him like that and use him in any way he wanted? How could anyone follow him when he could be broken so easily?  
  


Linkara stared at the wall and wept, knowing that nothing would ever be right again.

***

The crew of Comicron-One was unusually quiet. Normally, their meetings were loud and energetic, the planning and debriefing getting mixed in with their banter and petty insults. Now, as Spoony finished giving a very blunt and concise summary of events, they were completely silent.  
  


Harvey was the first to speak. “So what are we going to do with this scientist?”  
  


“I’ve got that covered,” Spoony said vehemently. “With a red hot poker and a gunblade.”  
  


“And what do we do with Linkara?” Pollo asked.  
  


“Just watch him,” Spoony said. “Make sure he’s okay. Or at least not self-destructive. I’ll be back tomorrow. Just… follow whatever protocol he has in place for now.”  
  


The crew nodded and Spoony teleported home, a hard glint in his pale green eyes.  
  


Insano was going to pay.


	2. Taking Charge

Spoony had not always been the best person. He had done things in his life that he wasn’t proud of. He had a history of angry outbursts and violent behavior. Once, what Insano had done would not have bothered him. Hell, Spoony had done similar things to several of his colleagues in the past. But that was before he had fallen in love with Linkara, before Linkara had shown him how to be good, how to be gentle, how to love. Linkara had always been good, had always loved Spoony for whatever stupid reason, and he had brought out something good in him, had trusted him enough to believe he could be better.

But Spoony had not changed completely. He was a better man, but he still wasn’t perfect. He could still be angry. He was still prone to violence.  
  


Especially when someone hurt Linkara.  
  


That was why Spoony waited until Insano was conscious. Stood and stared for several minutes while the scientist recovered. Because he wanted Insano to know what happened to people who hurt Linkara.  
  


Wanted him to feel every ounce of pain that Spoony was about to deliver.  
  


And as soon as Insano was fully alert and looking Spoony in the eye, it began. Simply at first, more kicks and punches that would bruise and bleed. He didn’t bother to unchain Insano from the desk, just hit him where he lay. Insano didn’t protest, didn’t flinch, made no sound as Spoony beat him. It was as good as an admission of guilt as far as Spoony was concerned and it only served to anger him further. He was determined to punish Insano, to make him feel all the pain Spoony had seen in Linkara’s eyes.  
  


There was no doubt in either of their minds that Spoony would kill his clone. Slowly, painfully, with his bare hands if necessary.  
  


This went on for several minutes. Spoony knew that Insano would black out again soon, but once he had started, he couldn’t stop.  
  


Until he heard an all-too-familiar voice from the top of the stairs. “What the hell?”  
  


Spoony looked up to see the spirals and lab coat that he knew all too well.

***

Linkara stared at the wall, not really seeing it, not daring to sleep. Every inch of his body still ached and every time he closed his eyes, Spoony’s face swam in front of him. He still lay on his side, his arms curled around his chest. He hadn’t moved since Spoony had left, not even to take off his glasses.  
  


He had heard Spoony talking, explaining what had happened, and had listened to the soft murmurs of his crew as they discussed what to do next. At least, he assumed that was what they were saying. The words were distant and indistinct, much to his relief.  
  


After a long time, hours at least, the door opened and Harvey’s careful, gentle voice called, “Kid?”  
  


Linkara didn’t move. Nothing anyone said would make any difference.  
  


“We were getting dinner. Do you want anything?”  
  


Linkara shook his head. Food held no appeal for him; the disgust of what had been done to him ran too deep.  
  


“Can I do anything?”  
  


Linkara shook his head again. What could anyone do? It was over, it had happened, and Linkara had been unable to prevent it.  
  


Harvey stood in the doorway for a moment before closing the door and going back to the kitchen.  
  


Linkara continued to stare at the wall. If only the eyes he saw when he closed his own weren’t so filled with hate…

***

The ragtag crew of Comicron-One sat at the kitchen table, not saying much. Of all the battles they had fought, all the hardships they had faced, this had to be the worst. This time, there was nothing they could do, no enemy they could fight, no one to lead them. They had never prepared for anything like this. None of them knew what to do for Linkara. For the crew, the helplessness was new and unwelcome.  
  


All, that is, except for Harvey.  
  


Harvey Finevoice had seen a lot of things in his life and he knew quite a lot about the horrors that were inflicted on people every day. He had seen it before, the wide, terrified eyes, the silent, fearful cringing, the bruised cheeks, the ravaged neck. He had known what had happened even before Spoony had explained everything.  
  


That was why Harvey stood at the head of the table, laying down the ground rules for the time being.  
  


“First off, no one bothers the kid. If we need to tell him anything, I’ll talk to him, but he’s extremely vulnerable right now and will need space.  
  


“Second, I want a full-scale investigation launched to find out how a two-bit scientist managed to get in here and snatch the kid right out from under our noses. There was no intruder alert any time in the last twelve hours. I want Nimue questioned and all surveillance scanned. I wanna know.  
  


“Third, I want security tightened.”  
  


“How?” Dr. Linksano asked. “We already have the best security system in Minnesota.”  
  


“It’s clearly not good enough,” Harvey snapped. “I want the doors locked twenty-four-seven, however you can do it. Windows shut and locked at all times. Teleportation locked from all signals except the ship. Get surveillance cameras in every room, not just the shared ones, every room, and those little robot rats patrolling the hallways. I want a sentry with the kid at all times, outside his door with a weapon. And if Dr. Insano so much as sticks his nose in the door of the building, I want him shot on sight. Any questions?”  
  


There was a moment of silence.  
  


“Then let’s get to it. Junior, go look over the surveillance footage and tell me if you find anything suspicious. Doc, get the new security up as fast as you can, however you can manage it. Blue, go talk to Nimue and find out how the hell she missed an intruder, especially that bastard. I’ll look after the kid. The rest of you can go back to your duties unless Linksano needs assistance.”  
  


The meeting broke up, Harvey’s orders being promptly carried out. Harvey took his place by Linkara’s door, fingering his pistol, wishing that he could do more than simply bark orders and guard a door. Wishing he could do something that would actually help.

***

Insano—the one who had returned an hour before—came up the stairs into the kitchen, shaking his head. Spoony was waiting, his hands wrapped around a cup of decaf coffee, looking more lost and angry than ever.  
  


“Explain,” Spoony said the moment Insano appeared.  
  


“I wish I could,” Insano sighed. “But whatever it is, it’s not talking.”  
  


“You don’t even know what the fuck it is?” Spoony snapped.  
  


“No. That will take several extensive tests and possibly some violent torture, which I’m sure you will enjoy considering how determined you are to kill it. But since I don’t actually know what it is or why you’re trying to kill it, I think you had better do the explaining right now.”  
  


Spoony stared at Insano for a minute. Linkara’s crew was one thing—they needed to know what had happened so they could take care of him and protect him—but Insano was an outsider, an enemy, someone who didn’t need to know the details of Linkara’s personal life. Then again, it was Insano’s form that had committed the crime, Insano who would be moved back to the vaulted position of “worst enemy” on Comicron-One, Insano who would be hunted down as soon as the crew was done taking care of Linkara. So Spoony explained, giving the same concise summary that he had given to the crew.  
  


When Spoony was finished, Insano was quiet for a long time, looking thoughtful. He began to pace, muttering under his breath, hands twitching incessantly, and finally turned back to Spoony. “We need to upgrade our weapons.”  
  


Spoony blinked. “What?”  
  


“Our weapons. We’re going to need them upgraded.”

Spoony stared at him for several seconds. “Okay… how the hell is that going to help Linkara?”  
  


“Who said anything about helping Linkara? I’m worrying about us.”  
  


“Us? Linkara’s the one in trouble!”  
  


“Linkara is fine. Or will he be after some therapy. We need to take care of ourselves.”  
  


“He was raped!” Spoony shouted. “Tied down, beaten, and fucking raped, and you’re saying that he’ll be fine? My boyfriend is hurt and it’s my fault and you’re saying we should worry about ourselves?”  
  


“It’s not your fault and Linkara’s not in any danger. If Linkara was who it was after, he would already be dead. Right now, he’s completely safe.”

“How do you know that?”  
  


Insano looked at Spoony in that way he had, the way that let Spoony know he was being a complete idiot. “Really, Spoony. We’re clones. We came from the same genetic material. There must be some semblance of my brain in there, so use it! Pretend you have the capacity to be evil. Got that?”  
  


“What do you mean, the capacity to be evil?” Spoony snapped. “I don’t recall any point where I haven’t been unable to be evil when necessary.”  
  


“Precisely. When necessary. You’ve always been neutral, but that’s not important now. Pretend that you’re really evil and you have a specific target. Now say that your target is Linkara. Would kidnapping and raping him really be your first plan of action?”  
  


“No,” Spoony answered, puzzled.  
  


“Of course not. Everything that happened was mishandled, to put it mildly. I mean, think about it. Somehow, this thing broke into the most heavily guarded apartment in Minneapolis, eluded the gaze of half a dozen crew members, including a robot, a ninja, and the most advanced A.I. unit on earth, and incapacitated the Champion of the universe without getting fried by his magic gun. If Linkara was the main target, he would have been killed in his apartment, not dragged back here and fucked with. Here, I might add, where his crew would immediately think to look for him and where he can be easily rescued by his thoroughly pissed-off boyfriend and taken home, where they won’t get another shot at him because his crew will not let there be another breach any time in the next century. No, Linkara’s not what they want.”  
  


“So what was the fucking point of all that?” Spoony asked in frustration. “What the fuck did it hope to accomplish?”  
  


“Several things, actually. One, while Linkara is not gone, he is out of the way for the time being. I can almost guarantee that he won’t be leaving his base for quite some time, meaning they won’t have to fight him when the time comes and if they do, he won’t be quite as formidable.  
  


“Two, it serves as a distraction. While you’re busy worrying about Linkara and beating the shit out of a pawn, the real threat can move in and take us out.”  
  


“What makes you so sure it’s not alone?”  
  


“A move like this needs back-up, especially since it involves both the Champion and the Avatar. No, there’s something else orchestrating this, something that clearly doesn’t mind losing pawns since this one wasn’t rescued when you left the room.  
  


“Finally, this event was meant to separate you and me.”  
  


“What?”  
  


“Why else would it use my form? It’s clearly been watching for quite a while since it played me convincingly and knows your exact relationship with Linkara—not that it’s classified information, you two are absolutely sickening. But why would it take my form when it could use yours to similar effect?”  
  


“Because Linkara knows I wouldn’t—”  
  


“Does he?” Insano interrupted. “You’ve done it before, Spoony. And while you’ve shown a marked improvement in your behavior since you started seeing him, you still aren’t _good_.”  
  


Spoony stared at his coffee in silence. It was true. Spoony was neutral, his ability to be good hampered by a desire to do evil, his ability to be truly evil limited by his love for Linkara. Linkara, who had always been good and who had tried to make Spoony good and who had been hurt because of him and who deserved so much better…  
  


“Why settle for weakening your relationship when it could be shattered completely? No, they wanted to make you distrust me. It wouldn’t be too hard, it’s public knowledge that our relationship is… difficult.”  
  


Spoony snorted. “That’s the understatement of the fucking century.”

“But you trust me. You wouldn’t let me live here if you didn’t. We’re allies, at least, if not friends, and even if you do help thwart all my plans to take over the world and I try to kill you periodically, we can live and work together. But given that our relationship is so difficult, an event like this is more than enough to put a barrier between us. Or would have been, if I had come back a few hours later after you had murdered it.”  
  


“And given how fucking hard it is to get rid of you, I would have accepted that you had come back from the dead.”  
  


“And probably killed me anyway. And then you would have been left alone with no one to help you but a semi-functional robot and a small dog when they made their move. Hardly a threat to whatever it is that’s trying to kill you.”

“It is after me, then,” Spoony muttered. “And Linkara just got in the way.”  
  


“Heroes tend to do that,” Insano said with a shrug. “I’m only interested in how this thing got past his security. And why it wants to kill you but not him.”  
  


“It didn’t say anything?”  
  


“Not a word. It just stared at me as though it was amused by the interrogation. Which was especially creepy since it’s still using our face. As I said, it might take some torture to get any information out of it.”  
  


“Good,” Spoony said vehemently. “I have a few ideas.”  
  


Insano looked at him, almost fondly. “You know, if you weren’t so in love with a hero, you would be an excellent villain.”  
  


Spoony shook his head. “I don’t think the world can take more than one of you. Besides, I’ve tried being evil before and it didn’t work out so well.”  
  


“And this has?”  
  


“No,” Spoony admitted. “But that’s why I’m not a hero. I don’t have to fucking wallow without doing things because of my morals. Besides, righteous anger is so much more satisfying than pure evil.”  
  


“Yes, I’m sure. But we can’t start right now. It’s late and it won’t be going anywhere for a while. We can save revenge for tomorrow.”  
  


Spoony nodded and rose from the table. “By the way,” he said as he headed for bed, knowing that he wouldn’t sleep but not able to think of anything else to do. “Where the hell have you been?”  
  


Insano gave him an odd look. “Redecorating the Exit Strategy,” he answered. “Where I told you I’d be three days ago. Or where you not paying attention when I said the son and I wanted to move out permanently?”  
  


Spoony shrugged. “I guess I forgot.”


	3. Finding Hope

Silence permeated the base, despite the fact that no one slept. Linkara knew they were still awake. He could hear them shuffling around, doing anything to distract themselves, their footsteps echoing in the quiet, the occasional whir of a passing Cybermat providing a strange counterpoint.  
  
  
Linkara hated it.

 

  
Normally, silence would be a welcome relief from the usual shouting and squabbling, the gunshots and alarms, the explosions and Nirvana, the updates from Nimue, the television blaring, Harvey singing… but right now, awake and horrified, the silence was oppressive. Linkara wanted the noise back to distract him, to give him some sense of normalcy. But the others didn’t want to bother him, didn’t know how to approach him.

 

  
Not that he could blame them. They were fighters and entertainers, not therapists. When bad things happened, most of the crew wanted to jump into action, wanted to do something. There was nothing to do now and so the crew was silent.

 

  
Linkara knew that he shouldn’t have let Spoony tell them what had happened. It wasn’t like Linkara hadn’t had his share of strange, unwanted sexual encounters before. That was just part of working at Channel Awesome. There had been an unfortunately similar incident with Ask That Guy a few years before that was probably more disturbing overall that he had handled reasonably well on his own, though that was probably because Linkara had been drugged through most of it and didn’t remember many of the details. And it wasn’t like Guy was the spitting image of the person who Linkara trusted more than anyone else…

 

  
Linkara’s eyes drifted shut and he slept, but only because he couldn’t stare at the wall any longer.

***

“Um, dude?” 90’s Kid’s voice crackled over the communicator. Harvey picked up immediately.

 

“What is it, Junior?”

 

“You’re gonna wanna have a look at this tape.”

 

“Something interesting?”

 

“Yeah, you could say that.”

 

“I’ll be right up. Ninja, watch the kid for me.”

 

Harvey pressed a button on his watch and almost immediately found himself on board Comicron-One. He ran down to security as quickly as he could.

 

90’s Kid and Linksano were both leaning over the monitor, examining security footage from earlier that day, both frowning in confusion.

 

“Okay, Junior, what’s going on?”

 

90’s Kid pressed some buttons and then stood back so Harvey could see. Two videos played side by side, both from 2:00 that afternoon. One showed Linkara sitting on the futon, reading whatever god-awful comic he was planning to review that week. The other showed the front door, which opened as a second Linkara walked in.

 

Harvey stared. How was it possible? Had Insano managed to clone Linkara? Whatever it was, it certainly explained how the breach occurred. Nimue was programmed not to count resemblances as a breach; it was a given that almost every member of the crew had messed with hypertime to an alarming degree, which tended to result in a lot of oddities.

 

The second Linkara walked down the hall. 90’s Kid hit a button and the footage picked up the intruder in the kitchen. He paused by the door to the living room, looking in for a moment before his form abruptly changed. Grew taller, his hair darkening, his face transforming until Spoony stood in the kitchen.

 

Harvey’s confusion grew. A hologram, maybe? Insano was capable, surely, and Spoony was someone who had free access to the base, someone Linkara trusted completely, whose sudden appearance wouldn’t set off an alarm…

 

The thing that appeared to be Spoony entered the living room. Linkara glanced up and smiled with genuine surprise and delight. The footage had no sound, but Harvey had learned to read lips fairly well over the years. Linkara said something about needing a break. The thing smiled and said, “I figured,” before pulling Linkara up off the couch and into a hard, claiming kiss. Linkara’s eyes widened briefly before they closed and he went limp.

 

90’s Kid turned the footage off and turned to Harvey. “What do you think, dude?”

 

Harvey shrugged, turning to Linksano. “Does Insano have holographic equipment?”

 

“I doubt it,” Linksano answered. “Though I’m not familiar with all his inventions. But I don’t think that was a hologram. Holograms don’t usually knock people out by kissing them. Admittedly, it could have been some sort of drug, but that wouldn’t work on a hologram very well.” Linksano reached into his pocket and pulled out a phone, dialing it quickly. “Spoony?” he barked as soon as there was an answer. “That thing that… yes. It’s not real… I see. Has it spoken?... No?... I think it’s from Earth 16-D… no… Did you scan him?... I’ll take care of it… yes… Don’t kill it!... I don’t know… I’ll let you know… yes… All right, I’ll see you tomorrow. Let me know if it says anything.” He hung up and pulled a tricorder from his coat. “Finevoice, take this down to Linkara and scan him. We should have done it when he first got back, but I didn’t realize hypertime was involved. Of course, it could be worse than we thought…”

 

“Care to let us know what’s going on?” Harvey asked irritably.  
  
  


“I believe what we’re dealing with is from Earth 16-D, an alternate Earth where everyone can shape-shift, has many advanced drugs and weapons and is extremely violent. They are also part of the empire set up by Lord Vyce, one of the worlds that we haven’t gotten to. I was there very briefly on my travels, but I can’t say if this… encounter will have an adverse effect on Linkara… or more of one, physically. Go scan him and we’ll see."  
  
  


“What sort of effects?” Harvey demanded in alarm.

  
  


“I’m not sure. It depends on how compatible Earth 16-D is with Earth 4-W. There could be anything from interdimensional diseases to an unplanned pregnancy. Not likely,” he added at the looks of horror on Harvey and 90’s Kid’s faces. “But it is possible. Worst case scenario, and unfortunately more likely, is that the universes are so different that either Linkara or his attacker or both of them will have been poisoned by the encounter. Which is why you need to scan him now, so we can catch it early and save him.”

  
  


“You got it.” Harvey grabbed the scanner and returned to the base.

***

_“Linkara.” The voice was gentle, familiar, and Linkara smiled as he opened his eyes. Spoony smiled down at him, green eyes shining as he bent and kissed Linkara in that wonderful way of his, in the way that told Linkara that he was about to experience mind-blowing pleasure. Linkara kissed back eagerly, pressing himself closer, his arms wrapping around Spoony, his hands tangling in the dark hair, deepening the kiss._

 

_Spoony pulled away suddenly and looked at Linkara. Linkara stared back, confused. Once Spoony started something, he always finished, no interruptions. But then Linkara looked into Spoony’s eyes and saw…_

 

_“Spoony?” he whispered fearfully. It was back. That cruelty. That hatred._

 

_“Do you love me?” Spoony asked roughly, his hands moving down, forcing Linkara’s legs apart. “Do you want me, Linkara?”_

_“Spoony!”_

 

_A harsh kiss silenced him, biting down hard on his lower lip. Linkara tried to move away, tried to push Spoony off of him, but Spoony caught his wrists and pushed his hands above his head. Linkara tried to pull away, but Spoony’s grip was too strong. Linkara’s legs were forced apart and Spoony was forcing himself into him and biting down on his neck…_

 

_“No!” Linkara screamed. “No, please, Spoony, not again… not again…”_

 

_“Kid! Kid!”_

Linkara woke with a start. Harvey was beside him, kneeling by the bed, looking concerned. He was holding a tricorder and was clearly in the process of checking Linkara over.

 

“What happened?” Harvey asked gently.

“Nightmare,” Linkara muttered. He didn’t want to talk about it, especially since Spoony wasn’t at fault in reality. Spoony would never hurt him like that…

 

Harvey nodded and finished scanning Linkara.

 

“Why are you scanning me?” Linkara asked dully.

 

“It wasn’t really that crazy doctor,” Harvey said. “We don’t quite know what it is… Linksano said something about hypertime… but we’re working on it. And we’re upgrading security. But we have to make sure that the encounter didn’t leave any lasting effects that could, well…”

 

“Kill me?”

 

“I don’t think it will, Kid, but…”

 

Linkara nodded. It didn’t matter, really. Whoever had attacked him, whatever measures were being put in place, it made no difference. It had happened. And now Linkara’s image of Spoony was forever tarnished. The possibility of death barely registered.

 

Harvey glanced at the scanner. “Normal,” he muttered. “Spoony will be by tomorrow… later today, really. Hopefully he’ll have something we can work with. Meantime, I gotta ask. What’s the last thing you remember before… before it happened?”

 

Linkara stared at the wall, trying to remember. Nothing seemed to be present in his memory before he woke up in the dark room. He tried, but…

 

“Under the Red Hood number seven,” he mumbled.

Harvey nodded. “That’s what I thought.” He pressed his communicator and beamed out.

 

Linkara went back to staring at the wall, dreading the morning when he would have to face Spoony again.

***

Spoony hung up the phone and headed back to the kitchen. Insano was sitting at the table, scribbling notes and muttering to himself. He barely glanced up as Spoony entered.

 

“What have you got?” Insano asked.

 

“Linksano just called. He said it’s most likely from Earth 16-D, whatever the hell that means.”

  
“16-D… yes… Yes, that makes sense,” Insano muttered, making a note. “They would be interested in our world… though why they’re interested in you instead of Linkara is a complete mystery.” He frowned. “Did you scan Linkara after you rescued him?”  
  
“No,” Spoony answered. “Linksano said they’d take care of it.” He hesitated. “Will he… do you think he’ll be all right?”

  
“I can’t say,” Insano answered. “But we’ll know soon enough if he’s not, even if the scanners don’t pick anything up. The sorts of problems that come from interdimensional contact of this kind tend to manifest fairly quickly.”  
  
“Will the scanners be effective?” Spoony asked.

  
“Most likely, since Comicron-One was built to move through hypertime easily. But there is always a certain percentage of error, so there is a chance they will miss something. The most we can hope is that the scanners pick something up before it manifests, though even if the readings are negative they’ll have to run tests to be absolutely sure.”  
  
Spoony’s fists clenched and Insano stood up quickly. “I said no torturing until tomorrow.”

 

“I know,” Spoony muttered. “And Linksano said we can’t kill it. But Linkara…”

“Isn’t going to get better just because you kill his attacker. If there’s any lasting physical damage, it’s already been done and beating a pawn from 16-D isn’t going to change that.”

 

“I know!” Spoony snapped. “I know I can’t fucking help him! I know I’m fucking useless! I know I utterly fail as a boyfriend! I just… I need to fucking do something!”

 

Insano waited patiently. He didn’t even flinch when Spoony suddenly turned and punched the wall, leaving a sizable dent and making his hand bleed. “Feel better?” he asked as Spoony collapsed into a chair.

 

Spoony glared. “No,” he muttered.

 

Insano sighed. Spoony was truly infuriating at times, with his overblown emotions and reckless nature. That wouldn’t be so bad, actually, if Spoony didn’t try so hard to be good. It had its benefits, sure—that fact that Spoony didn’t throw the scientist out despite their rocky relationship, for one—but it did result in a lot of pent up anger that tended to come out in rather unhealthy ways. And while beating the shit out of the thing currently chained in the basement would be satisfying, it probably wouldn’t quell Spoony’s anger or guilt. Of course, there wasn’t really anything healthy that Spoony could do in this situation…

 

The sudden trilling of a cell phone disrupted Insano’s thoughts. Spoony picked up immediately. “Yeah?” he grunted. “Yes… Normal?... You sure?... Insano said you might need to run more tests… I know… we haven’t started… Okay… okay… Shit… All right, I’ll see you in a few.” He hung up. “I need to go,” Spoony said. “They got the scans back and need me back at the base.”

 

“At two o’clock in the morning?”

 

Spoony shrugged. “Linkara’s awake and needs someone with him. Besides, are you going to sleep tonight?”

 

Insano shook his head. “I’m going to go run some tests on it,” he sighed. “If I don’t get anything before you get back, I’ll let you take over.”

 

Spoony nodded and teleported out.

***

As far as Spoony could tell, Linkara hadn’t moved since he’d left hours before. His hat and glasses had been removed and set on the nightstand, though Spoony suspected that Linkara hadn’t touched them.

 

Linkara didn’t move when Spoony came in. He was still wide-eyed and staring at the wall, his blue eyes bright from all-consuming terror and red rimmed from where he had been crying.

 

“Linkara?” Spoony said quietly, not caring that it was two o’clock in the morning. Linkara clearly wasn’t sleeping.

 

The only response was a slight tensing of his shoulders. Spoony had expected it, but it still hurt. He sat down cautiously on the other side of the bed, carefully not touching Linkara. Linkara didn’t turn, didn’t look at his lover… if Spoony could even call himself that anymore.

 

“Linkara, I’m so, so sorry,” Spoony whispered. “I’m so sorry you got caught up in this… whatever this is, I don’t know yet, but they wanted to hurt me and you were the fastest way to do that. I should have been hurt, not you. And… if you don’t want me anymore, I… I’ll understand, I’ll go. I don’t want you to get hurt anymore because of me.”

“Spoony,” Linkara interrupted. “No.”

 

A hand reached back and took his. “Don’t leave me,” Linkara begged. “Please don’t leave me. I need you. I’m scared to death and I need you. They said…” He broke off and started sobbing again. “Harvey said there could be more to this and they don’t know what and that it was some interdimensional thing which makes it all feel worse and that I could actually die! I could fucking die! And part of me wants to, and the other part of me... the last thing I need is to lose you.” He rolled over and looked at Spoony with tear-filled eyes. “I can’t lose you. That’s what it wants. If I lose you, I have nothing else to live for.”

 

Spoony lay down and took Linkara gently in his arms. “It’s okay,” he whispered. “I’m here. I’ll be here as long as you want.”

 

Linkara curled into Spoony, taking in the familiar scent of cheap cologne and fast food and Oreo and feeling like things could get better.

  
Maybe they wouldn’t be good, but they would get better.


	4. Gaining Ground

Dr. Linksano came in around five in the morning. His goggles were off and he seemed less manic than usual. Spoony hadn’t slept in more than twenty-four hours, but he had enough energy to register how odd it was.

 

Linkara had slept fitfully for the last few hours, but he sat up immediately when the scientist entered. Spoony sat up with him. “What’s going on?” Linkara asked.

 

“We’re ready to run the tests,” Linksano answered. “Just to be sure. Though the fact that you’ve shown no symptoms so far is promising.”

 

Linkara nodded and rose from the bed unsteadily. “Do you need me?” Spoony asked.

 

Linkara hesitated. “Is…it… still in your house?”

 

“We’ve tied it down,” Spoony answered. “And Insano rigged something so it can’t teleport out. We were planning on questioning it today.”

 

Linkara nodded. “Do you still have that communicator I gave you?”

 

“Yeah,” Spoony said.

 

“Beam up when you’re finished?” Linkara said tentatively. A request. Not an order, like he’d usually give.

 

“Sure.” Spoony teleported out as Linkara and Linksano beamed up.

***

Linkara hadn’t been lying when he told Spoony he was scared. From what Harvey had said, there was no knowing what interdimensional rape could do.

 

Dr. Linksano was at least confident. He had assured Linkara that if anything was wrong, he could probably fix it. “So you probably won’t die,” he said in a tone that was much too cheerful for Linkara’s liking. Somehow, it wasn’t very reassuring.

 

Harvey stood in the corner, trying to looking impassive, though his hands were twitching and Linkara could tell that the singer wanted a cigarette more than ever, though of course Linksano had banned smoking in the lab. “It’s okay, Kid,” Harvey said as Linkara lay down on the examining table. “You’re going to be fine.”

 

Linkara knew Harvey was trying to reassure himself more than him, but he couldn’t be upset about it. He wished Spoony was there, not that he’d be able to do anything but hold his hand and swear if things went wrong. “Where is the rest of the crew?” Linkara asked.

 

“Putting up the new security,” Harvey answered. “We’re rigging the whole base to tell us when anything comes in, including us.”

 

“Why?” Linkara asked. He hadn’t been told exactly what was going on, and he needed to keep talking in order to distract himself from whatever Linksano was doing.

 

“We believe that this being came from Earth 16-D, where all the people can shape-shift,” Linksano answered. “It got in by taking your form and then taking Spoony’s in order to capture you without raising the alarm. If Earth 16-D is interested in you, we have to be suspicious of everyone.”

 

“Because that worked so well last time something got into the base,” Linkara muttered.

 

“At least we have warning this time,” Harvey pointed out. “And we’re not stuck in one place And we can work out some sort of secret code or signal so we can avoid any more breaches.”

 

“Yes, we got off lucky this time,” Linksano agreed. “Hold out your arm.”

 

Linkara obeyed and flinched as Linksano drew blood. “How is there a universe like that?” he asked. “It seems kind of random and oddly specific.”

 

“That’s the thing about an infinite multiverse,” Linksano answered as he bandaged Linkara’s arm. “Anything is possible. For everything anyone does, there is a universe where they do something else. Every possible change, every combination of possibilities, everything that anyone can imagine, exists somewhere. And we can only access a small percentage of them. Earth 16-D happens to be in our sphere.”

 

“What makes some universes accessible but others not?” Harvey asked.

 

“We can only access the universes that are close enough to support us, but so far removed from our own that it is practically unrecognizable—not in the sense of weird creatures, necessarily, but in the sense that a change in the base universe was monumental enough to affect more than a few people. For example, I am from Earth 982, which is extremely similar to this earth, but many of the people I knew there are complete opposites of their counterparts here,”

 

“As in personality?” Linkara asked.

 

“As in the closest counterpart your Spoony had there was the most beautiful woman I ever knew as opposed to a screaming gamer.”

 

“That’s just weird,” Harvey commented.

 

“Yes. Now stop talking. This test is almost complete and I need to concentrate.”

***

Insano met Spoony the moment he returned. “It’s ready to talk,” the scientist said. “But only to you.”

 

Spoony nodded. “Did your tests find anything?”

 

“It’s definitely from Earth 16-D,” Insano answered. “And from the looks of things, its attack on Linkara did more damage to it than to him, though we’ll have to wait for results to be sure. It probably didn’t help that you beat the shit out of it. Anyway, you’d better get to it or it’ll expire before you get anything out of it.”

 

Spoony nodded and headed down to the lab. The being from 16-D was strapped to the examining table, looking decidedly weaker than before. It still bore Spoony's face and it was definitely creepy, and it only reminded Spoony of his own shortcomings. His own failures.

 

Spoony sat down in front of creature. It looked at him passively. “Do you want to talk?” it asked,

its voice the same as Spoony’s. “Or are you just here to finish me off?”

  
  


“I’m here to talk,” Spoony answered. “But only when you put on your own face.”

 

It laughed. “This is my own face,” it said. “I am you. The Spoony One. Or close enough, even if things came out a little differently in my world. For convenience, you can call me Tandem.”

 

Spoony glowered. “You aren’t me,” he snapped. “We may look alike and share a name, but we are not the fucking same.”

 

“Maybe we aren’t now,” Tandem said. “But we started out that way. Circumstances were just arranged differently. I’ve had to do things you wouldn’t do. Had to give up being a fucking hero.”

 

Spoony ignored him. “Why did you hurt him?” he asked. “Why did you want to hurt me?”

 

“It’s not that I want to hurt you,” Tandem said. “I did want to hurt him. He certainly hurt me. And he’ll hurt you. Or would if the people who I work for didn’t need you out of the way.”

 

“What do you mean? Linkara couldn’t have hurt you. You come from a different fucking universe.”

 

“Maybe I wasn’t specific enough. My Linkara hurt me. Your Linkara is the same. That’s why I hurt him.”

 

“Whatever your Linkara did has nothing to do with mine,” Spoony said. “And you should have known what I’d do to you. And why are your people so fucking interested in me, anyway? Linkara’s the Champion of the universe.”

 

“Linkara is the Champion of this universe,” Tandem agreed. “You are the Avatar, and for us, that’s a much bigger threat. There’s a plot… well, you’re probably not interested. But while the Avatar of this world is still whole, nothing can take it. Nothing can destroy it. We can try, but it’s hard just to keep a gateway open, let alone take over. My job was to destroy you in every way… weaken you so when the time came, you could be killed. But Insano managed to fuck it up. If he hadn’t come in right then…”

 

“So are your people going to give up?”

 

“Of course not. All you’ve done is delay the inevitable. Buy time for Linkara to hurt you, if he survives. Because he will hurt you. He will betray you. He will fucking destroy you.”

 

“So that’s why you turned evil.”

 

Tandem didn’t answer for a moment. “It’s not evil,” he finally said. “Bad things happened in my universe and he tried to stop it. And I loved him for it. But then… he betrayed me, left me to die at the hands of our enemies, and I would have if they hadn’t cut a deal…it was my life or his.”

 

“You killed your Linkara,” Spoony whispered.

Tandem nodded. “I’m sorry,” he said. “But I couldn’t… it’s a strange thing survival. Some men will give up everything just to live a little longer, just to survive another day. I’m one of those men, and I had to give him up, even though I loved him. Even though I still love him.” He smiled. “No matter how many universes I visit—and I’ve seen a lot—I always love him. Every Spoony One loves a Linkara. And every Linkara loves a Spoony. It may not always be healthy and kind like you seem to have, but it’s always there. It’s always him. And I don’t want to find a universe where I don’t love him, no matter how much it hurts. Because I do love him. Always.”

 

“So you hurt him back?”

 

“Just this one. The one most like mine. The one I was sent to hurt.” Tandem kept smiling. “My time’s up. I’m sorry it hurts this much.”

 

His eyes closed and his breathing stopped. Spoony stared for a moment.

 

He felt nothing.

***

Ten minutes later, Spoony beamed up to Comicron-One and headed toward the lab. He had left Insano to deal with the body.

 

He walked slowly, trying to make sense of what Tandem had said.

 

_No matter how many universes… I always love him._

 

Was love what drove him to hurt people? To hurt Linkara?

 

 _Every Spoony One loves a Linkara_.  
  
Did they all get hurt? Did they all hurt each other?

 

_It may not always be healthy or kind… but it’s always there._

 

Did that mean that it was unavoidable that Linkara would be hurt? That he would hurt Spoony?

 

_I’ll be here as long as you want._

 

_Even if I hurt you. I’m not strong enough to stay away._

 

He took a deep breath before he entered the lab. He had decided not to mention the creature’s connection to him, not wanting to push Linkara away anymore. He also realized that the tests may not be going well and was afraid, but he opened the door. He had to see Linkara, even if it would be the last time.  
  
Linkara looked around as Spoony entered. A smile was a bit beyond him, but that was all right since Spoony knew he probably looked just as miserable.

  
He looked so weak, lying on the examining table with Dr. Linksano hovering over him with his testing equipment. Spoony crossed the room and knelt beside him, taking his hand, wanting to comfort him but not knowing how. “How’s it going?” he asked, unable to think of anything else to say.

  
“So far, so good,” Harvey answered from the corner. “We’re at the last test and haven’t found anything yet. How’d you do with… it?”

  
Spoony shook his head. “Something in our universe was toxic to it; it died before I got anything out of it.”

  
Nobody said anything. Linksano finished whatever he was doing and looked at the results. “Negative,” he announced to general relief.

  
Linkara got up from the table, not letting go of Spoony’s hand. “Linksano,” he said, his voice a bit stronger. “Contact Dr. Insano and find out what the toxin was. We might be able to use it as a weapon.” He turned and left the room, pulling Spoony down the long, empty corridors of Comicron-One, not stopping until they reached the captain’s quarters. Linkara rarely used this room, but it was the only place he could be guaranteed privacy, since no one else had the passcode. He tugged Spoony inside before letting go of him and collapsing onto the bed. Spoony sat down next to him, gently putting his arm around him, watching for any sign of discomfort, but Linkara only leaned into him. “I’m sorry,” Linkara murmured.

  
“No,” Spoony said. “No. You don’t need to be sorry. I… it… this isn’t your fault.”

  
Linkara nodded. “I know it’s not, I just… we… us… Spoony, I don’t think it can be the way it was before.”

  
“I know.”

  
“And I can’t be… with you… not like that… at least not right now… I love you, but I can’t…”

  
“I know. I’ll wait until you’re ready.”

  
Linkara held him. “What if I’m never ready?”

  
Spoony kissed his temple. “Then I’ll wait forever.”


	5. Moving On

Six months had passed and everything had returned to normal. Or at least, as normal as could be expected under the circumstances. The base was still under lockdown, though Linksano and Insano had developed a way to ensure nothing from Earth 16-D could get in.

 

“It was fairly easy,” Linksano said as the crew lined up. “The toxins that killed that thing don’t affect us…”

 

“So we’re going to inject all of you with it,” Insano finished. He and Linksano had spent the first few weeks after the incident collaborating on the project, although it was a solid month before Linkara had been able to face Spoony’s clone. Even if he wasn’t at fault, Linkara couldn’t forget the spirals that had looked at him before they were removed to reveal eyes full of hatred.

 

“You’re sure it’s not harmful?” Linkara asked nervously.

 

“Quite,” Linksano answered. “We both tested it and we’re fine.”

 

Spoony rolled his eyes. “How many times have we told you not to test things on yourselves?”

 

“I didn’t see you volunteering,” Insano snapped back. “Anyway, we can inject all of you with this and it will merge with your DNA.”

 

“Then we can program the locks not to open unless it finds the chemical in your bloodstream,” Linksano concluded.

 

“You can program a lock to read a blood sample?” Linkara asked, impressed.

 

“Of course!” Linksano cackled.

 

“We can do anything with the power of SCIENCE!” Insano added.

 

So it had been done and it worked. The base was as secure as they could make it.

 

Not that it made much difference. Even six months later, Linkara was quieter, smaller than before. He still made his reviews, still ran his ship, still went about his life as usual, but everyone could tell he was haunted by the event. Spoony had tried to convince him to go to a therapist—“There’s no shame in asking for help with this”—but Linkara had refused, pointing out that telling a normal therapist that he had been raped by a being from another dimension disguised as his boyfriend’s clone would most likely result in him being put in the psych ward.

 

Not that he could just forget what had happened and go back to life as usual. If the lockdown wasn’t enough to remind him, he was still plagued by flashbacks and nightmares for the first three months. He would start reviews and have to stop halfway through because he would be struck by the memory, feeling it all over again, suddenly screaming out for someone, anyone to help him. Luckily, Spoony had stayed at the base for all that time, ready to turn off the camera and hold Linkara close until he was ready to go on, sleeping beside him, or at least trying to, since Linkara had barely been able to sleep the night through since then. Not that Spoony could sleep either. When he closed his eyes, he heard Linkara’s terrified screams and remembered the way his counterpart from Earth 16-D spoke so casually of harming his lover…

 

But the nightmares subsided soon enough, and the flashbacks stopped not long after, and while Linkara was far from fine, he was beginning to move on. To heal.

 

And after six months, he was almost back to normal.

 

It was only when Linkara had managed to sleep the whole night through for an entire week that Harvey agreed to start lifting security. The singer had been running half the operation over the last six months, for which Linkara was eternally grateful, even though it was a bit annoying to be constantly watched and to have to unlock the door every time he wanted to take a breath. And while the base was still under lockdown and would remain that way until Earth 16-D made its next move, it was nice to go out by himself and just walk and talk to his magic gun, who seemed just as upset as he was.

 

“I could have helped,” she said when Linkara finally got away to a quiet place where they could talk without interruption. “I could have stopped it.”

 

“I know,” Linkara answered. “If you had been there, we could have kicked his ass. But that wasn’t your fault. I wasn’t careful enough.”

 

“I’m never letting anyone else get near you,” she declared. “I won’t let you get hurt again.”

 

“You can’t always protect me,” he said reassuringly. “But I’ll never leave you behind again.”

***

It was a few weeks after the security lifted that Linkara approached Spoony. It was hard, but he knew he wanted to take this step. Spoony had stayed close the entire time, had put Linkara first every step of the way. Linkara was glad of it, and it was time.

 

“Spoony?” Linkara said quietly. Spoony looked up from his computer. “Come with me?” Linkara asked tentatively, hesitantly. Asking instead of commanding. He didn’t give orders any more.

 

But Spoony still obeyed, setting aside his review, rising from his chair, taking Linkara’s hand as he pressed the button to beam up to the ship. Followed him through the large, silent corridors to the captain’s quarters. It was only when the door closed that Spoony realized what Linkara was asking.

 

“Linkara…” Spoony began before Linkara pulled him into a deep, needy kiss. Spoony knew what that sort of kiss meant, but he was not at all certain that this was what Linkara really wanted. Spoony pulled away. “Are you sure?” he asked quietly. “You’re not just feeling obligated to me or anything like that?”

 

“I want you,” Linkara answered. “I want to give myself to you. And… I need this. I need this to heal. I know it sounds stupid, but please, Spoony…”

 

Spoony nodded, pulling Linkara into another kiss, the kind that said how much he loved him, how much he wanted him, how much he wanted Linkara to trust him. And Linkara kissed back in a way that said he loved Spoony just as much, that he wanted him just as strongly, that he trusted Spoony with every part of himself.

 

They ended up on the bed, clothes seeming to disappear without any conscious effort, lips moving over each other, hands roving everywhere their mouths couldn’t reach. Their touches were gentle, soft, whispers of contact, but still eager, still desperate to express all the desire they felt.

 

Spoony stopped suddenly and sat back, looking at Linkara. He had always been strong, beautiful, perfect in Spoony’s eyes. And he still was, even though his strength was quieter and his skin still bore the marks of the attack. If anything, they only made him more beautiful.

 

“Spoony?” Linkara whispered, looking up at him. He wasn’t afraid or alarmed, just confused.

 

“Shh,” Spoony hissed, bending down to kiss him. His lips moved down to Linkara’s neck, finding the scar that still stood out vividly again his pale skin and kissing it gently.

 

“Spoony!”

 

He stopped and looked up, looking for any sign of panic, any sign of fear. Linkara’s eyes were half-closed, darkened by lust, but there was no sign of distress. “I want…” he whispered.

 

Spoony nodded. They moved together, Linkara’s arms and legs winding around Spoony as he took him, slowly, tenderly, pressing Linkara into the mattress, lips moving back to his neck.

 

They pressed close together, giving and taking with everything they had, and if there were tears, they weren’t spoken of, only kissed away with soft assurances that it would be all right, assurances that were readily accepted. The climax came in a flash of ecstasy and they collapsed. Linkara let go of Spoony and Spoony rolled off of him, looking at him with all the love he could express.

 

Linkara leaned over and kissed him. “I love you,” he murmured.

 

_No matter what universe…_

 

“I love you, too,” Spoony whispered back. “Always. No matter what.”


End file.
